I’ve never thought I’d be #foreveralone. Like, I’ve always felt like a relationship could be in my future – equally as possible and fulfilling as being single would be. But, I definitely never imagined I would agree to being in a long distance relationship…and have it last almost two years and counting 😛
I don’t want to turn my blog into a personal diary but I do want to turn it into a lifestyle resource for young women. So, after almost two years of being in a long distance relationship, I’m sharing the 7 things I’ve learned from being in one so that you can either relate or prepare yourself for your own!
1. Trust is key.
Being away from each other means it’s harder to “keep tabs”. Your partner is going to say things and you’re just going to have to trust that they’re telling the truth. Some people say trust must be earned when in reality you have to put your trust out there first to even give the person an opportunity to gain your trust.
If you’re feeling doubtful, ask yourself if it’s your partner you don’t trust or if the doubts are coming from your own insecurity. I’m proud to say my relationship has crap tons of trust 🙂
2. “Me” time is a must.
People in LDRs compensate for not seeing each other by talking to each other a lot. The downside is that you might end up neglecting yourself by always taking care of your partner 👿
Remember that meeting your own needs sets you up to better meet the needs of your partner. Plus, everyone needs to recharge and cultivate their own passions. And, having a life shows that you’re not dependent on your partner – which is attractive. #independent #queen #beyonce
3. Jealousy can affect anyone.
Neither Mike or I consider ourselves to be jealous people. But, even so, we have our moments. It’s the same thing with confidence. A generally confident person still has, and is affected, by their insecurities.
Like #1, ask yourself if you are jealous because of your partner’s actions or because of a personal issue.
4. First you text, then you call. Then, you Snapchat.
At the beginning of our relationship, we texted a lot. But then, we moved to phone calls – probably because we could hear each other’s voices and gauge each other’s feelings through tone of voice 🙂
But nowadays, we actually communicate through Snapchat because it’s like the non-committal version of Skype. You can see and hear each other without having to commit a block of time to talking to each other.
It’s like video tag 😉
Skyping is probably common for long distance couples but prioritise the medium that works best for you.
Every couple is different.
5. It’s easy to feel distant.
Long distance couples are already away from each other. When you add in a busy schedule and low-grade communication, it’s easy to feel distant with the smallest amount of time not spent talking to each other.
Try fitting in a quick phone call even on a busy day, just to make the effort. At the same time, try to understand that life can get in the way and forgive your partner if they just can’t make it happen 🙂
6. Make yourself happy.
Because your partner isn’t able to be around all the time to pick you up when you’re down, you have to be able to make yourself happy first. Pick up a hobby after work. I blog and practice photography while Mike practices Brazilian jiujitsu and mixed martial arts. You can also try mixing in catching up with friends that you haven’t seen in a while. I like to combine my love of trying new restaurants with social outings! 😀
Keeping busy helps keep the loneliness away plus it tends to your needs as an individual.
Can you tell I’m all about the individual first? Because I AM! 🙂
7. Emotional growth comes faster.
Long distance can limit the amount of physical intimacy in your relationship. But, with all the bonding you do, to make up for the distance, helps your relationship grow much faster, emotionally.
For example, when you see each other all the time, you can rely on the fact that your partner is right there to deal with. Maybe they’re giving you the cold shoulder. And maybe you think they’re going to cave soon since they can’t avoid you. But when you’re away from each other, emotional distance feels cavernous so you tend to want to resolve your issues quickly, tactfully, and eloquently. No colourful language! 👿
I hope you enjoyed the 7 things I learned from being in a long distance relationship! I wanted to open up about being in one because I figured there are some readers out there that are currently in one or have been in one and need a girlfriend to relate to. Plus, I’ve had a several requests for me to write about LDRs 😉
I’m thinking about writing more posts about long distance relationships i.e. a survival guide, tips, specific situations, stories but it’s all up to you guys! Let me know what you think in the comments.
Have you been in a long distance relationship? Are you considering one? Or would you never?
Photography by Katie Mitchell